For whatever reason, there’s a lingering social stigma regarding men and sex toys. While women can talk openly about their vibrators, a man with a pocket pussy is regarded as some kind of bizarre pervert.

I seriously wonder why any man has sex without one of these. A simple cock ring attaches around the base of the penis or scrotum, trapping blood inside the penis. What this means is a rock hard erection from a stiff breeze.

Unlike your high school days of discovering women’s bra straps for the first time, however, you’re not going to have an orgasm without some serious effort on your part. Before you talk to your doctor about Viagra, talk to your local porn store clerk about a cock ring.

Suggestions: Leather is nice and neoprene is a great substitute for the vegan kinkster. The Deluxe Erection Maker, handmade right here in L.A. by JT’s Stockroom is aptly named, though novices might want to go for something more basic.

It makes sense that you might not want a massive vibrator around the house – though, to be fair, if you do have one that would be kind of awesome. Still, you’re not going to meet many ladies who won’t love you when you pull this one out.

A pocket rocket is little more than a very small vibrator. It’s not there for penetration, but clitoral stimulation. You can also give it a whirl on the glans of your penis if you’re a more adventurous kind of guy. One thing is for certain, though: Bring this home to your special lady friend and she’s not going to complain.

Suggestions: The one at the impulse purchase section of your local sex shop will get the job done, but probably won’t last too long. You can buy one with an attachment that looks like a little bunny, which gets the job done even cuter.

If you’re going to get a masturbation toy, why not get the very best? Not only will the terminally single man find this a reasonable substitute for the physical pleasures of the boudoir, bachelors on the prowl can use it to keep their stamina in check between long dry spells.

Suggestions: You can skimp on a pocket pussy or you can get the product that’s almost synonymous with male masturbation toys. You can grab a Fleshlight for under $60, so it’s not like you’re investing in a real doll here, gents.

A great way to give your dick a workout: combine this with a cock ring and you’re basically cross-training your balls for a sexual triathlon

Gentlemen, I know this isn’t the easiest topic to get into, but let me be blunt: Stop being a baby and get to know your prostate. Feels good, man. There’s something a little childish and well, unmanly about a man who’s afraid to experience the pleasure of his own butthole.

You might not actually be into it, but unless you do some serious fiddling around down there, you’re never going to know for sure. And hey, if you can’t get down with the brown, you can at least get into some perineum stuff. That’s also called “the taint.” Press hard on it and it feels good. Try it. Right now.

Suggestions: Aneros offers a whole line of products of products for the man who wants to get to know the pleasures of the anus, as well as men who are well acquainted with it. You can even get stuff that goes inside you and presses on the perineum at the same time. Did we mention that they have starter kits?

Let me speak directly to the men right now: If your life is devoid of sex toys, you are missing out, my friend

Fuzzy handcuffs, leather wrist cuff, or anything else you find particularly appealing is something you should have around. Whether you want to restrain your partner or be restrained, it’s always fun to have something like this lying around.

Maybe you’re more into ropes, in which case you don’t even have to go to the porn store. A quick trip to Home Depot will do.